Alan G
Member Since: 15 Oct 2008
Location: Lanarkshire
Posts: 1372
  
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FORREST GUMP!
Forrest Gump died & was sent on his way to Heaven.
Upon his arrival, a concerned St Peter met Forrest at the Pearly Gates.
"I'm sorry, Forrest". St Peter said.
"But Heaven is suffering from an overload of goodly souls and we have been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for new arrivals to ease the burden of Heavenly Arrivals.
"That's Cool," said Forrest, "What does the Entrance Exam consist of"?
"3 Questions" said St Peter. "Which are"? Asked Forrest!
"The First", said St Peter, Is. “Which two days of the week start with the letters, T�
"The second is how many seconds are there in a year�
"The third is what was the name of the swagman in the song Waltzing Matilda"?
"Now" said St Peter, "Go away and think about those questions Forrest, and when I call upon you, I shall expect you to have those answers for me."
So Forrest went away and gave those three questions some considerable thought.
The following morning, St Peter called upon Forrest and asked if he had considered the questions, to which Forrest replied, "I have".
"Well then," said St Peter, "Which two days of the week start with the letter T?"
Forrest said, “Today . . . and tomorrow."
St Peter pondered this answer for some time, and decided that indeed the answer can be applied to the question.
"Well then Forrest, could I have your answer to the second of the three questions?" St Peter went on, “How many seconds in a year?"
Forrest replied, "Just 12!" "Only 12?" exclaimed St Peter, "How did you arrive at that figure Forrest?"
"Easyâ€, said Forest. "There's the second of January, the second of February right through to the second of December, giving a total of twelve seconds."
St Peter looked at Forrest and said, "I need some time to consider your answer before I can give you my decision." And he walked away shaking his head . . .
A short time later St Peter returned to Forrest. "I'll allow the answer stand Forrest, but you need to get the third and final question exactly correct"
"Now Forrest, can you tell me the answer to the name of the swagman in the song 'Waltzing Matilda�
Forrest replied, "Of the three questions, I found this the easiest to answer.â€It's Andy."
"It's Andy?†said a shocked St Peter. "Yes, it’s Andy," said Forrest.
This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that, deliberating the answer. Finally, he could not stand the suspense any longer, and turning to Forrest, he asked. "Forrest, how in God's name did you arrive at the name Andy?â€
"Easyâ€, said Forrest. . "Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited till his Billy boiled ..."
And Forrest entered Heaven
  ATB
Alan
http://www.youtube.com/user/Bonzo676767#p/u
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 26th Feb 2009 10:03 pm |
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