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DISCO3.CO.UK > Off Topic - Humour, Rants & Pointless Posts

Who said the Irish are thick
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Hobgoblin
 


Member Since: 15 Nov 2007
Location: As always, in the sh*t, it's only the depth that varies
Posts: 1445

Spain 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 HSE Lux Auto Kaikoura StoneDiscovery 4
Who said the Irish are thick

Paddy & Mick go to London to donate sperm.
It was a disaster!
Paddy missed the tube & Mick came on the bus!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Muslim was sitting next to Paddy on a plane. Paddy ordered a whiskey. The stewardess asked the Muslim if he'd like a drink.

He replied in disgust 'I'd rather be raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips!'

Paddy handed his drink back & said 'Me too, I didn’t know we had a choice!'

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Paddy calls Easy jet to book a flight. The operator asks 'How many people are flying with you?'

Paddy replies 'I don’t know! It’s your f***ing plane!!'

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Paddy & Murphy are working on a building site. Paddy says to Murphy 'I’m going to have the day off, I’m going to portend I’m mad!'

He climbs up the rafters , hangs upside down & shouts 'I'M A LIGHTBULB! I'M A LIGHTBULB!' Murphy watches in amazement!

The Foreman shouts 'Paddy you're mad, go home' So he leaves the site.

Murphy starts packing his kit up to leave as well.

'Where the hell are you going?' asks the Foreman.

'I can’t work in the friggin dark! ' says Murphy.

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Two Irish couples decided to swap partners for the night. After 3 hours of amazing sex Paddy says 'I wonder how the girls are getting on'

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Paddy takes his new wife to bed on their wedding night. She undresses & lies on the bed spread-eagled & says 'You know what I want don’t you?'

'Yeah,' says Paddy. 'The whole friggin bed by the looks of it!'

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q. Whets a Catholic priest & a pint of Guinness got in common?

A. Black coat, white collar & you've got to watch your Censored if you get a dodgy one! I'm not as good as I once was........but I'm as good once as I ever was.  
Post #38019528th Nov 2008 9:41 am
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heine
 


Member Since: 07 Feb 2007
Location: Midrand
Posts: 4054

South Africa 2009 Discovery 3 4.4 V8 HSE Auto Alaska WhiteDiscovery 3

Rolling with laughter

Especially the last one  
Post #38020428th Nov 2008 10:05 am
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DSL
Keeper of the wheelie bin 


Member Since: 11 May 2006
Location: Off again! :-)
Posts: 72794

Ukraine 

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter   
Post #38021128th Nov 2008 10:15 am
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BORDER ROVER
 


Member Since: 03 Dec 2007
Location: Cumbria
Posts: 1105

United Kingdom 2008 Discovery 3 TDV6 HSE Auto Java BlackDiscovery 3

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Thumbs Up POT NOODLE NAVIGATION CHALLENGE 2010 WINNER
Club Sankey
Club pie and peas  
Post #38021428th Nov 2008 10:21 am
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JF Lux
 


Member Since: 08 Sep 2007
Location: A little country in Europe
Posts: 3522

Luxembourg 2008 Discovery 3 TDV6 HSE Auto Java BlackDiscovery 3

Really like the one about the light bulb... Rolling with laughter The next American ex-pat that calls it a "truck" is going to find out what 2.7 tons feels like on their foot...

Club "yes, I too have had the EGR's replaced..."
Club "yes, I too have had the compressor replaced..."
Club "yes, I too once had the car at the dealer for a couple of weeks nearly 4 weeks over 4 weeks...5 weeks"
Club "yes, I too have had EPB failure..."
Club "yes, I too get mysterious bings and bongs..."  
Post #38022128th Nov 2008 10:31 am
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flinty99
 


Member Since: 17 Mar 2008
Location: Northumberland
Posts: 2558

England 

Very good start to the day Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter  
Post #38022728th Nov 2008 10:37 am
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zebadee
 


Member Since: 15 Feb 2006
Location: The Magic Roundabout
Posts: 1392

Ireland 

Excellent Thumbs Up Rolling with laughter

Particularly like the Easy Jet one Thumbs Up  
Post #38026328th Nov 2008 11:49 am
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Discoeast
 


Member Since: 19 Feb 2008
Location: Boksburg
Posts: 800

South Africa 2007 Discovery 3 TDV6 S Auto Zermatt SilverDiscovery 3

Very good Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter D3 bullbar-spots-roof rack with spots-ladder-long range tank-swing out spare wheel carrier- upgraded tow bar-dash console-internal water tank-duel awnings-drawer system & T T.  
Post #38038328th Nov 2008 5:16 pm
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Jimbob Squarepants
 


Member Since: 27 Oct 2007
Location: Miles Away from Home
Posts: 1063

United Kingdom 2007 Discovery 3 TDV6 XS Manual Zermatt SilverDiscovery 3

Brightened my day up Thumbs Up Too much intellectual firepower can damage your common sense.  
Post #38044728th Nov 2008 6:38 pm
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marcon
 


Member Since: 01 Mar 2006
Location: wex's Shed
Posts: 457

Ireland 2006 Discovery 3 TDV6 HSE Auto Zambezi SilverDiscovery 3

Good jokes Thumbs Up


But was it somebody fom the site that said we were thick Question








































Wink  
Post #38048928th Nov 2008 7:15 pm
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cherokee
 


Member Since: 03 Jul 2007
Location: preston
Posts: 562

2012 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 HSE Auto Nara BronzeDiscovery 4

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter

10 out of 10 you made my day Thumbs Up Always walk behind a Shooter and
In front of a Sh*ter  
Post #38084529th Nov 2008 6:19 pm
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robsmith
 


Member Since: 02 Sep 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Posts: 2392

United Kingdom 2005 Discovery 3 TDV6 S Manual Zermatt SilverDiscovery 3

Not I.......

Old joke (Dave Allen??)

Two Irish gents are on their little pony cart in a field, flash tourist is hurtling along the lanes in his fast car.

The Irish gents leave the field as flash tourist hurtles round the last bend before the field entrance and sees the cart in the middle of the road heading in the same direction as him, but he's going too fast, way too fast to stop without hitting them.
So he serves into the field.
Paddy turns to Murphy and said "Its a good job we got out of the field before that manic went tore into it". Rob Smith
Silver rools OK
  
Post #38085329th Nov 2008 6:40 pm
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